May 7th-17th

I have tentative plans to return to Dallas during this time period. We shall see.

My sister is turning 21 on May 15th. Happy early B-Day Sis!

I spoke with TG today. We had a nice chat. I am planning on going out to Tyler for a few days when I go to Texas. That will be nice. I haven't seen Aaron since my first trip home after boot camp and "A" school. I thought I was going to have a panic attack this morning and I don't know why. It came on pretty quick, but went away. The last time I had a panic attack was in Mississippi when it was getting close to time for me to go home. I couldn't sleep at night. It was miserable. I would lay in bed at 11 or so and stay awake until about 3 and then go to the couch. I would try to watch TV until I fell asleep. Most nights I got about 30 minutes to an hour of sleep. It was tough. I don't think I told anyone about it. I was fine once I got to Dallas. Boot camp was an experience. We didn't sleep the first two days. I wanted to die. I need my sleep. I was so close to climbing the fence in the middle of the night and running away. Mexico isn't that bad. Or Canada, I guess that is much closer to Chicago than Mexico.

All of you who are not in the military need to enjoy what you have. I still enjoy myself because I know that it could always be worse. But those of you who take everything you do on a daily basis for grant-it should appreciate the things that I and a million other people are doing. I lose 30% of my freedom to help provide you with 100% freedom. I cannot call in sick to work. I can't talk back to my asshole boss. Well, I can, but there would be drastic reprocussions. I can't quit if I don't like what I am doing. I take home a $565 pay check on the 1st and 15th. Try living on that.