About a Boy

A very good point was brought to my attention that I might live my life similar to the way the Hugh Grant does in the movie About a Boy. He goes by units of time. They are broken down into half hours. For me, it is work- 4.5 units, nap 2-4 units, exercise 2-4 units, TV 1-2 units. I have my routine and I very much dislike varying from it. It is almost like it throws off my inner clock. I f I do not go to the gym, I feel like a fat ass until I do exercise. No where in this is there time for people. I do make time for people other than myself, but I do so regrettably. I have become so self centered and oblivious to the outside world that I have lost control. It is hard for me to get close to someone because of my routine. When I do make plans with other people, for example Emma Cormos, whose little boy adores me...I do it only because I know that I should or that I know I need to leave my room. I do it for the boy who is away from his father for long periods of time and him being around a male who actually plays with him and gives him attention...he just eats it up. It is good for the both of us, but I am quick to retreat back to my quarters. My safe place. I cannot be hurt or hurt anyone else if I have nothing to do with the outside world. It is like I have a forcefield around me. It is almost inpenetrable. Hard to imagine that I, Josh Tips, am now a recluse. Back home it is quite the opposite. I am still active and outgoing...wanting to do things, but here I do not have the luxury of friendship. Or more importantly do not allow myslef that opportunity. It's quite an anomaly. Anyhow, that is me in a nut shell.